


~All I want for Christmas is You~

by LilKjay (orphan_account)



Category: Alternate Universe - Fandom, Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Chapter two.... fluff?, Christmas Wish, Cullen is a soldier, F/M, Long Distance Relationship, Longing, Modern Thedas, Mutual Masturbation, NSFW, Phone Sex, Skype Sex, Soulmates, True Love, Webcam Sex, but before we go further down that line, chatting, online-relationship, or smut?, you can decide!
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-20
Updated: 2016-12-20
Packaged: 2018-09-10 16:23:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8924032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/LilKjay
Summary: They never met in person. But Lilly is sure that the handsome soldier she met in an online roleplay game is the love of her life. Her soulmate. Circumstances prevented them to meet for so long. And so her only wish for christmas this year is to finally see him for real. Be in his arms. But dreams never come true so easily.





	

 

 

'I miss you...' Voice barely above a whisper, my slender hand touches the cold surface of the laptop screen. At once Cullen stops his monologue about his daily work in the office, scooting closer to the webcam. While at my place it is still late at night, for him it’s early morning. The sun has barely risen over the horizon, illuminating the golden color of his hair. Slowly but with insistence the curls escape the neat style he combed them into before his shift, one particularly cheeky strand curling over his forehead. Wrinkles from all the hard work had formed there, sleepless nights and too much worry. For the first ones I am partially responsible, the time difference between our countries nearly a half day. While for me its 10pm, for him it’s already early morning. 6am, give or take a few minutes. I hate the difference in time and distance, though we knew from the start that a long-distance relationship would not be easy. Even more in our case.

 

Golden eyes soften at the statement and his hand lifts to touch mine, fingertips touching - if it weren’t for the damned screen between us.

‘I miss you too, Kitty’ he says softly, adam's apple bobbing at his words. It is hard for the both of us, I can tell. And he does not like it when I cry, so I do my best to keep the tears from falling. Blinking several times to clear the watery fog I curl my fingers slightly on the glass, before adjusting the headset once more. Too big and not exactly comfortable, build with a human’s form in mind. And so the pointed tips of my ears get pressed against my head, tingling slightly at the decreased flow of blood.

 

His gaze follows my movement, another worry line finding its way on his forehead. Wrinkling skin I never ever touched... except in my dreams. Because in dreams, there aren’t thousand miles separating us.

Pink lips press in a thin line as I glance away, losing the fight against tears. How is it possible to love someone, even though you never saw them for real?

‘Don’t cry, Lilly...’ he whispers into the headset, voice cracking a bit at the end of the sentence.

‘In two days is christmas...’ I answer in the same whispered tone, swallowing hard yet again. At this he shifts, the chair on which he sits creaking in protest.

 

‘I know...’ Cullen`s gaze drifts away from the monitor and me, right hand leaving the screen to fumble for something on his desk. Scratching of parchment, the sound of something being unlocked. Muffled through the headset and his steady deep breathing, the curiosity too small to ask what he is doing. To be honest, I am grateful for the distraction, using the time to quickly wipe away tears with the sleeve of his shirt. My most treasured gift, next to his dog tag he sent me on my birthday nine months ago. On both his scent barely lingers now, fainted to my deepest regret. But wearing his shirt... it makes me feel closer to him. Wrapped up in his embrace, even though I don’t know how it would be for real. We know each other for so long... but never did we had the chance to meet in person. With my small loan as a waitress, I am barely able to afford the monthly rent to the tiny flat I call my own. But visiting him wouldn’t be an option anyway. Stationed in a country just barely keeping peace, it would be too dangerous for a trip there.

 

And him coming over... it is impossible either. His position in the army too important to simply slip away for a few days, just to meet a girl he met through an online-video game. And every now and then... I catch myself thinking that maybe... he doesn’t want to meet me at all. It is unfair, but after nearly three years, doubt seems to be everywhere. Friends don’t even joke about my “online-boyfriend” anymore, having moved on to other more interesting things to tease me. But for me, Cullen is more than just an “online-boyfriend”. He is my soulmate, the one I told my darkest, deepest secrets. We know so much about each other, troubled pasts and unfulfilled dreams. Only one thing is left denied…

 

I want to know how it would be to sleep in his arms, feel his body close to mine. Just one single kiss, I would sell my soul for. One kiss from these soft looking lips, experiencing if the scar on the upper lip is tangible. I am no stranger to sex and neither is he. We already shared…our bodies, in a way. As much as it is possible with thousands of miles between us. Watching him pleasuring himself while he whispers what he would do when we finally met. My eager and breathless responses to that, descriptions so vivid I almost could feel his hands on my most intimate places. But alas the world is cruel and whenever I open my eyes after our phone... sex... he isn’t there. Not lying breathlessly next to me, above or under me. No, I am still alone in my bed and that reality breaks my heart little by little.

 

With damp eyes I watch him shift on his chair, staring down at something in front of him on the desk. I can’t see it, the webcam just the tiniest bit too high adjusted. A strange expression flickers over his face and as he looks up, the smile he gives me makes my heart skip a beat.

‘In two days is christmas...’ he repeats my comment from earlier, closing whatever he was looking at with a muffled sound. My stomach flutters funnily and I tilt my head to the side, long hair secured in a braid slipping over one shoulder.

‘... and I will work the late shift at the shopping mall, yes.’ I say in a defeated jet mocking tone to lift the mood, which prompts a deep chuckle from him. All at once the sad tension between us is broken and he scoots closer to the monitor and webcam, pocketing whatever he was studying in the front pocket of my army uniform.

 

‘Still till 6pm?’ Cullen asks next and I pull a face, sighing dramatically.

‘Yes. till the bitter end playing christmas angel Lilly, the little helper of our dear Santa...’ I pinch my nose to mimic the voice of the old man who plays the role of Santa Claus in the shopping mall.

‘Ho, ho ho! My little angel flatter over and bring me one of the christmas present for little I-don’t-care-about-the-kid`s-name.’ Clearing my throat afterwards I add sheepishly.

‘Well, at least I get to wear a fancy white sparkling dress and have pretty wings!’

 

At this Cullen laughs loud and deep, the sound making me snort and finally laugh as well. I roll on my back and glance upside down at the mirror, watching how my beloved just slowly calmes down with a shake of his head.

‘Maker`s breath... how I love you.’ He exclaims, voice going soft and tender at the last three words. As always when he says this my eyes close on their own, saving the warmth blossoming in my body. The way the says it... I will never ever tire of it.

 

‘I love you too.’ my voice breaks a bit but I smile through tears gathering anew, fiddling with the dog tag on the long chain around my neck. ‘But still... I would rather spend christmas with you. I want to spend the rest of my days with you... tonight... tomorrow... the day after...’ I add after a moment of hesitation, glancing shyly up at the webcam directly. Golden eyes soften and there is this strange glint again in them but I pay it no mind as he rises from his chair to lock the door. My heart beats faster as he returns, picking up his laptop from the desk and walking over to the small bed. Carefully he places the laptop on the nightstand, controlling the view of his webcam as he settles down on the mattress.  

 

‘I know Kitty... I want that too...’ Cullen says softly then, adjusting the microphone with his other hand. His breath becomes louder and goosebumps raise on my skin, the sound like a wave of heat. Unspoken my body shifts too, settling in a way in front of the webcam so he is able to see me whole. An approving hum fills my headset and I start to tremble, glancing through dark eyelashes towards the screen.

‘It`s good I am not the Santa... because I would get you out of that dress so very quickly...’ He murmurs, his voice deepening and the shiver I feel intensifies. Biting my bottom lip, blue eyes trail over the full length of his form. Oh how I want to touch him. Just for one night...

‘Oh?’ I mumble curiously, sliding one hand down my own body, molding the oversized shirt to my curves. ‘I wouldn’t be against a quick tumble on Santa’s throne... and after you ravished me once we could continue this in my flat. You know it is not that far away...’

 

Cullen inhales sharply at that, golden eyes darkening as he unbuckles the belt of his trousers. The clanking sound feeds the hunger in me, dark eyelashes fluttering as I slide the hem of the shirt higher up my thigh.

‘Nothing will be quick when I finally have you underneath me...’ he breathes into the microphone. A sliver of sadness reminds me that this won’t ever happen... but as he  continues I surrender to the scene he paints with his words and voice.

‘I want to explore every inch of your body... learn for real what you like and don’t... Engrave my love in your skin so you will never forget who you belong to...’

 

Taking a shuddering breath which is no doubt audible for him I lick my lips, the wetness between my legs gathered there since he locked the door.

‘And... and I would surrender to you... Oh... Cullen...’ I whisper the last word with a sigh as my hand finds its way between my legs, trailing over the damp fabric of my panties. I know his eyes are glued to where my fingers disappear, the sound of a zipper opening signaling that he will join me soon into pleasure.

‘Mh... spread your legs a bit more... let me see what you do…’ Cullen orders and I obey, shifting on the bed and pulling off my panties. There is no shame as I bare myself to him, because it is rightfully his already. No one knows me like he does. And oh how I wish that it would be his hand caressing and massaging... not mine.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> .  
> .  
> .  
>  So. As said in the tags:  
> Fluffy Chapter two? Or smutty chapter two? What do you want to read? Your decision!  
> So go on and give me your vote! :)
> 
>  
> 
> _By the way: You can comment on a fic here on AO3 even if you don't have an account.  
>  Just insert your name (Example: "I.want.to.lick.Alistairs.lamppost.in.winter") and email address (Example: Hornyfangirl@hotmail@com - later one won't be published!). And giving kudos is even more easier! Just click that handsome button which is named "Kudos ❤". Every author appreciates a feedback, not just me! Go spread some love :)_


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